Friendship
Friendship is a form of
interpersonal relationship generally considered to be closer than association, although there is a range of degrees of
intimacy in both friendships and associations. Friendship and association are often thought of as spanning across the same
continuum and are sometimes viewed as weaknesses. The study of friendship is included in the fields of
sociology,
social psychology,
anthropology,
philosophy, and
zoology. Various academic theories of friendship have been proposed, among which are
social exchange theory,
equity theory, relational
dialectics, and
attachment styles.
Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:
- The tendency to desire what is best for the other
- Sympathy and empathy
- Honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one's counterpart
- Mutual understanding and compassion; ability to go to each other for emotional support
- Enjoyment of each other's company
- Trust in one another
- Positive reciprocity — a relationship is based on equal give-and-take between the two parties.
- The ability to be oneself, express one's feelings and make mistakes without fear of judgement.
Types of friendships
Acquaintance:
not a true friend—sharing of emotional ties is absent. An example would
be a coworker with whom one enjoys eating lunch or having coffee, but
would not look to for emotional support. Many "friends" that appear on
social networking sites are generally associates in real life.
Best friend (or close friend): A person someone shares extremely strong interpersonal ties with as a friend.
BFF ("Best friends forever"): Slang used primarily in the USA by teenagers and young adults to describe a close friend.
Blood brother or
blood sister:
Either people related by birth, or a circle of friends who swear
loyalty by mixing the blood of each member together. This is not
recommended for risk of blood disease such as HIV.
Boston marriage:
An antiquated American term used during the 19th and 20th centuries to
denote two women who lived together in the same household independent of
male support. Relationships were not necessarily sexual. It was used to
quell fears of
lesbians after
World War I.
Bro or Bruh: Slang used primarily in the USA, Australia
and New Zealand by teenage and young adult men to describe a male close
friend. This term is currently used to describe the modern generation
of college-age male party goers. A bro is someone who one identifies
with on a deeper level. While partying might influence one's bros, true
bros stick by each other through thick and thin. While one male might
call another a bro, the true bro is a person who is the male's brother, a
friend so close, that blood relations do not matter.
Sis: Female equivalent of "bro".
Buddy:
In the USA, males and sometimes females often refer to each other as
"buddies", for example, introducing a male friend as their "buddy", or a
circle of male friends as "buddies". Buddies are also acquaintances
that one has during certain events. The term may also refer to an online
contact, such as the AOL Buddy List. It is also referred to a close
friend.
Casual relationship or
"friends with benefits":
A sexual or near-sexual and emotional relationship between two people
who do not expect or demand to share a formal romantic relationship.
This can also refer to a "hook-up".
Family friend: A friendship extended to family members of the
friends. Close relation is developed in those societies where family
setup is strong. This term is usually used in the Indian subcontinent.
Comrade: Means "ally", "friend", or "colleague" in a
military
or political connotation. This is the feeling of affinity that draws
people together in time of war or when people have a mutual enemy or
even a common goal. Friendship can be mistaken for comradeship. Former
New York Times war correspondent
Chris Hedges wrote:
We feel in wartime comradeship. We confuse this
with friendship, with love. There are those, who will insist that the
comradeship of war is love – the exotic glow that makes us in war feel
as one people, one entity, is real, but this is part of war's
intoxication. [...] Friends are predetermined; friendship takes place
between men and women who possess an intellectual and emotional affinity
for each other. But comradeship – that ecstatic bliss that comes with
belonging to the crowd in wartime – is within our reach. We can all have
comrades.
As a war ends, or a common enemy recedes, many comrades return to
being strangers who lack friendship and have little in common. Sometimes
they even become enemies in another war.
Cross-sex friendship: A person having a friend of the opposite
sex with having little or no sexual or romantic activity: a male who
has a female friend, or a female who has a male friend. Historically,
cross-sex friendships have been rare. This is because often men would
labor in order to support themselves and their family, while women
stayed at home and took care of the housework and children. The lack of
contact led to men forming friendships exclusively with their colleagues
and women forming friendships with other stay-at-home mothers. However,
as women attended schools more and as their presence in the workplace
increased, the segregated friendship dynamic was altered, and cross-sex
friendships began to increase. Cross-sex friendship has once been a sign
of gender deviance, but now it has been loosened because of the
increase of gender equality in schools and the workplace, along with
certain interests and pastimes such as sports.
However, cross-sex friendships are not always a socially accepted
norm of amity, and some of those friendships could develop into romantic
feelings (see
romantic friendship). However, when these feelings are not mutual, they can often backfire, making it hard for the two to remain friends.
Frenemy: A portmanteau of the words
fr(iend) and
enemy, the term
frenemy
refers to someone who pretends to be a friend but actually is an
enemy—a proverbial wolf in sheep's clothing in the world of friendships.
This is also known as a love–hate relationship. Most people have
encountered a frenemy at one time or another in the same places one
might find friends—school, work, the neighborhood. The term
frenemy was reportedly coined by a sister of author and journalist
Jessica Mitford in 1977 and popularized more than twenty years later on the third season of
Sex and the City.
While most research on friendship and health has focused on the
positive relationship between the two, a frenemy is a potential source
of irritation and stress. One study by psychologist Dr. Julianne
Holt-Lunstad found that unpredictable love–hate relationships
characterized by ambivalence can lead to elevations in blood pressure.
In a previous study, the same researcher found that blood pressure is
higher around friends for whom one has mixed feelings than it is people
whom one clearly dislikes.
Fruit fly,
fag hag (female) or
fag stag (male)
:
denotes a person (usually heterosexual) who forms deep ties or close
friendships with gay men. Men (gay or straight) who have lesbian friends
have been referred to as "lezbros" or "lesbros".
[15]
The term has often been claimed by these straight members in
gay-straight friendships; however, some feel that it is derogatory.
Imaginary friend:
a non-physical friend created by a child or even an adult. Sometimes
they are human; other times, they are animals, such as the life-size
rabbit in the
1950 Jimmy Stewart movie
Harvey.
Imaginary friends are also created for people desperate for social
interaction but are isolated from contact with humans and pets. It may
be seen as bad behavior or even taboo (some religious parents even
consider their child to be possessed by an evil "spirit"), but is most
commonly regarded as harmless, typical childhood behavior. The friend
may or may not be human and commonly serves a protective purpose.
Internet relationship: a form of friendship or romance which takes place over the
Internet.
Some internet friendships evolve into real-life friendships. Internet
friendships are in similar context to pen pals. These friendships are
also based on the thought that the other person that they may not have
ever met in real life knows them for who they are instead of the mask
they may use in real life.
Mate: In the UK, Ireland, Australia, and New Zealand,
blokes
often refer to each other as "mates", for example, introducing a male
friend as their "mate", or a circle of male friends as "mates". In the
UK, as well as Australia, this term has begun to be taken up by women as
well as men.
Open relationship: a relationship, usually between two people, that agree each partner is free to have
sexual intercourse with others outside the relationship. When this agreement is made between a married couple, it is called an "open marriage".
Communal friendship: a friendship in which the friends gather
often to provide encouragement and emotional support in times of great
need. This type of friendship tends to last only when opposing parties
fulfill the expectations of support for the relationship.
Agentic friendship: a friendship in which both parties look
toward each other for help in achieving practical goals in their
personal and professional life.
These friends help with completing projects, study for an exam, or help
a friend move out. These types of friends value sharing time together,
but only if there are no other priorities and the friend is actually
available to help in the first place. Emotions and sharing of personal
information is of no concern to this friend type.
Pen pal:
people who have a relationship via postal correspondence. Now pen pals
have been established into internet friendships with the use of chat or
social networking sites. They may or may not have met each other in
person and may share either love, friendship, or simply an association
between each other. This type of correspondence was encouraged in many
elementary school children; it was thought that an outside source of
information or a different person's experience would help the child
become more worldly.